First, the source and material. I just by the shafts with one end closed and the other I close with my wire bender. https://www.lurepartsonline.com/Looped-End-Wire-Shafts
As for diameter, I use a micrometer (analog or digital) and measure spinners that are close to what I want to make. I think you will find that there is quite a range. For example, Rooster Tail used a much thinner wire than any other spinner of that size, but when the bend, and the bend often, they are useful only to cut apart for materials.
For material, I don't worry about it when I buy the premade shafts. If you buy the coils from the same company, like lurepartsonline.com, it will be the right stuff. For whatever it is worth, it is spring stainless steel.
https://www.lurepartsonline.com/Stainless-Steel-Wire-coils
To me, diameter of wire is not that critical. If you have a large enough, but not too large, clevis you can use a range of wire sizes. I find that .062 wire is a bit large for most bass lures, but I use it for Muskie/pike spinners a lot. But, as you mentioned, bendability is an issue. If it bends, but springs back to shape, great, use it. If it bends, but takes a set and has to be re-bent back into shape, you will not enjoy it much.